Cancer Research, my Dad, and Race for Life x

After everything that happened with my grandad, I knew I wanted to raise as much money as I could for Cancer Research and the Macmillan nurses. At my grandad's funeral this is what the donations were put towards, but I wanted to raise money myself for such a great cause.

The cancer research charity is truly inspirational, and I want to help them towards being able to hopefully one day finding a cure to cancer. If fund raising events did not happen, my grandad would not have had all the help he did get, and my dad may not have been so lucky so this means a huuuge amount! 

I decided I would take part in the annual 'Race for Life' in my hometown in 2010, with my mum, a friend of hers and my best friend. Before we had begun training and fundraising for this event, we had bad news..we had been on holiday the summer of 2008 as a family, and Dad hadn't been very well. He is one of those stubborn people that doesn't like going to the doctors...says that his body will just get on with it etc etc. In the end, mum told him he had to go and get checked out as he just wasn't himself at all, and I'm so glad she, well, forced him to go!

I was at uni at the time in my second year, and didn't actually know at this point that Dad had gone to the doctors, let alone been sent to the hospital for scans! Unfortunately, it was bad news :( Being at uni, mum didn't want to tell me over the phone nor tell my brother first, so didn't let on anything bad was going on. When I went home for a weekend, mum sat my brother and I down, and said she needed to talk. This never happens, I think the last time it had, was the talk about my grandad so I panicked.. 

My heart sunk once the word cancer had been mentioned. Everything kind of blurred, so mum had to keep repeating things as I just wasn't hearing straight. I knew that when we heard about grandad, he had 9months and I was praying that this would not be the same. Thankfully, mum had told dad to go to the doctors in enough time so that they could start treating the cancer that had been found. Although I was terrified of losing my dad, like I did with grandad, I had to stay positive, for everyone, especially my dad! He was so scared understandably and I hated being at my first year at uni and the fact that I couldn't see him every day. I came home as much as I could to help mum with everything and just to be of a support.

Dad started chemo and radiotherapy pretty much straight away to see if an operation was needed. Quite a big one was, but I still thought then what if mum hadn't told him he HAD to go to the doctors, what if...I am just so thankful for everything, that he was seen in time. I had time off from uni whilst dad had his operation but really didn't enjoy the time in which mum was the only one that could visit, me and my brother just sat at home hoping everything was going okay. Over the time that he was in hospital, I loved going to see him, keeping him company, just telling him what we had been doing that day, having a chit chat :) He told me loads of funny stories, and had become friends with people on his ward, even starting up a fantasy football type game! I never wanted to leave him because I hated seeing him in pain and looking worried. 

Thankfully, with all the help of the doctors, Dad was given the all clear at the end of 2009, and could celebrate his 60th in January 2010.

Dad and I at his 60th party :) x

This made me even more committed to raising lots of money, but also to have a great time doing it! We raised about £300 altogether, more than we anticipated, so it all felt really worth it!

Sarah, Tasha, Mum and me :) x

Again, this year mum and I are going to attempt to run the Race for Life. It is so important for us, and I can't imagine us not doing it now after all that we have gone through.

If you would like to donate / sponsor us with any amount at all that you can, it would be greatly appreciated! :) www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/thebalmergirls

I hope everyone who has helped knows how thankful I really am! xx Thanks for reading! xx

My friends Emma and Danielle have also written posts on the same issue:

Emma - http://fallenangel-yummymummy.blogspot.com/2011/01/cancer-research-uk.html

Danielle - http://tinkstales-tinkerbelldani.blogspot.com/2011/01/pancreatic-cancer.html

My amazing grandad and cancer x

As many of you may have read in my 'about me' section, this is a huge part of my life for me, as my grandad passed away just over 3 years ago :( but my dad also had a cancer scare which will be on another post, so I'm sorry if this post goes a bit rubbish and is an essay but it feels better to get it all out! 

My grandad was a truly amazing man and he is remembered every single day. I was really close to him, always round at his and my granny's house and the farm as a child through to until he died, so was understandably devastated when he had to leave us.

Apparently when me and my brother were a lot younger, there had been a cancer scare but wasn't brought up and begun to be treated without any of the grandchildren becoming aware. When it made a big reappearance a couple of years later (as we have now been told), it turned out that because of his age (thankfully he had lived a long life) that there wasn't really much that people could do. He really looked out for me, as well as the rest of my family, always making jokes and continually keeping everyone so happy. 

I would have loved for him to see where I am now, to meet my boyfriend Liam as I've mentioned before as they would have got on so well, and I am sure he would have been so proud to see me so happy, doing well at uni, and generally just enjoying life. One of the things I dislike about being at uni is not being able to see people as much, in particular my Granny and Nan.

The day my brother and I were told of the news about my Grandad definitely brought us even closer together as a family, but also made me want to spend as much time with my Grandad as possible. I wanted to be there constantly to help look after him as the doctors had given him about 7-9months. Luckily, over the summer (about 6 months) he was still fighting and we all got to spend the summer with him. 

It was so so hard to see him get weaker and weaker, but there was no way he wanted to go into a home or anything like that - when it was once suggested, he said he may as well give up if that was going to happen, so it was never mentioned again. Although he obviously depended on all of us to help him, he wanted to fight this battle his way. The Macmillan nurses did such a great job coming out nearly every day towards the end and I will always be thankful that it was them, that allowed him to stay in his own home, where he was most comfortable.

He also had the local vicar to come round and say a couple of prayers for Gran & Grandad every weekend, as he couldn't attend the Sunday service that he liked to. As this was the vicar that took the service at his funeral, it meant a lot that he had fulfilled wishes that my grandad had.

9months after the doctors said we should be prepared for the worst he was still here. He really was a true fighter and stayed for just over the maximum time had been predicted :)

I remember the day so clearly when my Grandad left us..I came downstairs for breakfast at just after 8am after the phone had just rung and saw Mum in floods of tears with my dad. I knew instantly, without asking that this was it. The worst was to be expected for 9months and this day had come.

Many things that have happened in my life really do make me have certain beliefs..I am not going to start preaching at you! but I know that there is someone who wanted my Grandad to be where he wanted when he died..and it was all as if it was meant to be in a weird way. 

My uncles always come into Gran & Grandad's house for 11 o'clock cup of coffee on a break from their work, and they all live so close together which means we all see each other so often :) 

On that particular morning, my Gran knew that this was it, and needed someone to help. As she went to the door to run and get my uncle (who lives right next door), my other uncle was just coming inside..this was what was meant to be. They helped my Grandad to his favourite chair in the conservatory, well, his chair..no one elses! where he used to sit and watch the sheep and cows all day long, and he died peacefully doing what he loved, just peacefully watching his herd :) To hear mum tell me all of this, made me so happy that it couldn't have ended more perfect.

The funeral was such a lovely service..I knew I had to be strong for everyone as we were all feeling the exact same. We expected there to be a fair few people as my grandad was such a well loved man, but as I sat by my gran in the funeral car and we pulled up we never did expect to see what we saw before us..there were hundreds! People had to be stood outside for the service as they couldn't fit in, even standing!! My Gran turned to me and said 'I can't do this,' to which I replied 'course you can' and squeezed her hand. It's weird how clear I remember everything. She held my hand so tightly whilst walking in and it made me so proud to be part of that family.

I was supposed to read out a poem I had found and asked to read, but I just knew I would break down, something I was trying so hard not to do, so my uncle read it instead for me.

The Broken Chain
 

We little knew that morning that God  
Was going to call your name.
In life we loved you dearly, 
 In death we do the same.

It broke our hearts to lose you,  
You did not go alone;  
For part of us went with you,  
The day God called you home.

You left us peaceful memories,  

Your love is still our guide;  

And though we can not see you,  
You are always at our side.

Our family chain is broken,  

And nothing seems the same;  

But as God calls us one by one,  
The Chain will link again.

 

I thought it fitted so perfectly with how we were all feeling and still do feel. I know that he will always be looking down watching me so I want to do everything to make him proud of me :)

RIP..never forgotten xx 10.09.07 xx